My theory on why you fall in love at the Jersey Shore
June 26, 2012 2 Comments
I was in my first wedding this summer for my friend Emily who just got married to her soul mate. I mean, literally, her in male form. They both love dancing, they both love dressing ridiculous, they both love sports and are so much fun you just want to hang out with them every weekend.
They met down the Jersey Shore.
There is the show that makes it seem like getting a shore house is a guido fest of body glitter and calf implants, but the reality of it, for those people living in south jersey and the suburbs of Philly at least, is that it’s the place where you can meet people just like you.
I like to think of it like digging for gold.
I know that sounds like someone picking their own boogers, but I guess it’s sort of like that too.
You see, when you live in Philly or South Jersey, the suburbs or in the city– it’s hard to differentiate and focus on the people that you would be the most compatible with.
Sure, you can meet people at softball leagues or at a coffee shop, but how do you know that person likes to have fun, has a job (or at least some sort of money) and isn’t a loser? You can’t!
When you meet someone down the shore, right off the bat, you know a few things about this person, and most likely, they just learned those same things about you.
You have enough money to go in on a shore house.
It’s not like you need a ton of money, a lot of people can throw in about $1,200 for a half share and still be able to go down, but $1,200-$2,500, you know the person has some sort of income. Or their dad gives it to them. Also, they have the means to get down there re: car or friends with cars or at least money to get the NJ transit to Philly and then there. They also have money for booze while they are down there. Right from the beginning you know this person isn’t a total slacker, or at least their parents have enough money for him or her to fake it, but mostly everyone I meet down the shore at LEAST has a job. Clears out all the riffraff. Now I am not saying if you can’t afford a shore house you are a loser, or a slacker by definition, I’m just saying most people down the shore are weeded out. There are plenty of people who are fantastic that don’t get one, but they are harder to find at SIPS.
They like to have fun.
You don’t get a shore house with your buddies unless you like to have a good time. Hands down, you just cannot. And even if you don’t like to have fun, then you won’t be out at the bars drinking like a crazy person with everyone else, so that is another layer between you and destiny.
They are active
Not everyone needs to be a marathon runner, but if you are looking for someone who doesn’t like just sitting around watching TV, but actually likes getting out, socializing, going to the beach, playing games. You’re going to meet these people at the shore too.
No one I know that got a shore house likes to just sleep and watch tv. We didn’t have enough beds or even have a TV in our last house, so people were always up at the beach, day drinking, playing volleyball or doing something besides lounging.
You are being yourself
You know how they say you find a boyfriend when you aren’t looking? That’s because you aren’t acting like a total weirdo to seem hotter or cooler than you are, you are just acting like yourself. When you get a shore house, you are surrounded by friends and fun 24-7, add that to booze and you are going to be in your purest form ever. More often than not, you’re also going to be in your bathing suit, so there is nothing to hide people!
So if you are single, and you are having a tough time finding Mr. or Mrs. Right, maybe it’s time you got yourself a shore house for the summer so you can meet him or her.
If you are looking for a giant sieve that will separate the people without a job, a car, friends or are just boring in general from those you want to be around, a shore house does just that.
I met my man down the shore and couldn’t be happier. He is the guy I have been looking for my entire life.
I had this weird criteria of what I thought the perfect guy was for me since I was in high school.
I wanted a guy who drank milk, loved pick up trucks and read. You can even ask my friends, those were the things I wanted always. I guess I just wanted a smart guy who was American as hell and strong and to me those three things meant that he was all of that? I don’t really know exactly how I came up with those three things, but I did and it always sat in the back of my mind.
I wasn’t sure if I would ever find him– I really doubted he was in New York, but alas, there he was, making fun of my oversized men’s Jcrew button down shirt at the Princeton two years ago and we are perfect for each other still today.
SO moral of the story is, maybe you haven’t found him or her yet, and that’s ok, but my best bet is that they are probably at the Jersey Shore.