I’m sort of a big deal, and other fun Friday things

So, y’all know how much I love Aquaphor,  pretty much live for the product and how I wrote about it making your eyelashes grow, right?

Well, since writing that I have received a gift package from the company with some aquaphor in it! How amaze????

Hand written? DAYUMMM.

I suggest you all decide to hire New Media in Arlington, VA to handle your PR from now on folks, this is incredible marketing.

I’m an Aquaphor user and promoter for life now!

Onto the next one, currently obsessed with this song:

(duh)

I’m still trying to figure out the girl part? I think that she is singing about how she is his new girlfrann and is all, listen, why you still thinking about that girl you said you used to know? Obvi you are like still into her and stuff.

“And I wouldn’t catch you hung up on someone that you used to know,” so now I think this new girlfriend is going to be the NEW person he used to know when they break up. Ugh. UGH! DEEP!

Anyway, he’s like the new Sting and I love me some Sting, after all me he was my first real concert. Incredible.

I wish I could listen to it driving through the deserts of California in white v neck tees, cutoffs, hermes scarves tied around our heads,wearing vintage Chanel sunglasses, drinking a Coca Cola on ice in a 1970 white Mercedes convertible with my cousin Gwen.

But, alas, I am at work, just listening to it drinking a skinny iced vanilla latte.

So also, another product I am addicted to right now came from my girl Patrice from high school!

Neutrogena MicroMist tanning spray is amazing, no streaks– really even dark color, not orange at all!

Even a guy at work told me I had a really nice glow to my skin and looked naturally tan. Incredible. Changed my life!

If you have any other beauty loves, tips that you want to send on to me, please do! lizjenei@gmail.com or just send me a facebook message or even comment below! I would love to write about it.

ok– what else.

Oh yeah!

Last night I couldn’t stop thinking of Hermes Lacquer Printed Bracelettes because a friend from work has the most sickening one ever. So if you want to get me one, go for it.

Which brings me to the word of the day: Envy which can be used in the following context:

“I just got this really chic new bedazzled iPhone case.” Envy.

“I’m going to Miami tomorrow.” ENVY!

“I went for drinks last night with Biffy last night at Chloe and guess who was there? The Olsens.” Ennnnnvvvyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Also, if you are feeling street chic, simply: NV

OH! Also, if you are a jamba juice fan, here is a $2 coupon for a smoothie this afternoon!

And I think I’m getting this manicure at lunch:

I KNOW ennnvyyyy

Philly tonight to visit my girl lappi tappi !! SWAG!

Vegas in one month.

ENVY!!!

xoxo,

wcw

Spring is in the aiiirrrr

and that means it’s time to rev up the charge card and turn in rent on the 15th!

Here are a few things that I’ve been eyeing up like crazy for the new year– and guess what, some of this shit is from Old Navy and guess what again, I bet you will like it and click the link and guess what, I can see when you do that! Don’t be afraid, embrace clothes on the cheap– I won’t tell a soul.

All neon everything.

We know that neon is in the Spring, which I am not sure why considering I started wearing it approx. 7 years ago, but it’s still here and I love this shirt dress!

This little number is from Old Navy and is about $34– it’s linen LIKE drop waist highlighter yellow dress that would be perfect with a pair of peep toed flats, some gold link bracelets and a simple thin gold necklace.  It also comes in white and is cheap and can be worn to work, out on weekends–brunch, shopping, wherever!

Also from the old shnaves are these neon and neutral big wearing striped tees that I just die for.

So cute and really thin and comfortable and only $15…WHAT!

Next up are a bright strappy high sandal.

Check out these from Target!

I tried them on, they were super high and comfortable– just wasn’t really in the mood to get them, ya know?

They have similar pairs at Aldo, but why spend $90 on a shoe you can get for $30– it’s not like Aldo is of any type of upmost quality.

Same same but diff.

Slightly obsessed with this Rebecca Minkoff neon tribal sandal.

Also, I’m really coming into white right now and just love how clean a white tee looks.

Not crazy about the shoes, but I love this outfit.

and this

So laid back and kewl.

So there you have it– simplicity really.

Clean and LA neon styled threads.

xoxo,

wcw

Hipsters. BARF!

Hi, I hate hipsters.

They are so obnoxious and try hard and make me want to end it.

Why do they have to be so “obtuse”? Why does everything have to do with ironic brutality and WHAT’S WITH THE BIRDS?

Today I got this stupid email from Vice that’s subject read:

Put a bird on your head and punch me in the face

Listen, hipster, if I even squared up to punch you in the face, you would probably be so scared that you would pee your skinny jeans and run to the Kellog’s diner for shelter.

Vice is most annoying hipster magazine on the planet.  Filled with music that you will never hear anywhere but The Commodore, or one of the wood paneled barber shops on Havermeyer and pics of girls girls that are too fat or too thin to be wearing bikinis OR even topless; splayed out on your grandmother’s couch, a high school or even maybe a crack dens.

It’s so thoughtlessly contrived with this antiquated equation:

1 interesting looking girl – a bra + a dirty setting + bird (or cat) + eyeliner + 1 flannel shirt – shoes + angst = vice spread.

I mean– it’s one thing to be cool, artsy, different, but how is this any of that when you see the same thing over and over?

Show me something other than a girl sitting on a copier in an office that looks like it’s out of the 1960′s or topless doing splits in american apparel running shorts and then we will talk about how creative you are.

And please send me an email that doesn’t have the words: Birds, MIA , DIY and Leather, I dare ya.

I guess I’m just bitter because I live in Williamsburg, but at some point I just can’t take it anymore.

If you walk down the street in my hood, you would be hard pressed to find a single person smile.  I counted once and I didn’t see a single person smile for my entire commute.

That sucks!

Life isn’t that bad, so stop taking yourselves so seriously, hipsters, because guess what? We aren’t taking you seriously at all.

xoxo,

wcw

Can’t Sleep? WCW can help!

So this is a blog post for ladies and gents, I know I have been sort of writing more towards girls for the past year except for this little doozy about how to be a man at your company Christmas party  but today this is for both of y’all.

The thing is, life gets a hell of a lot harder after college, I know, insert direct eye contact followed by a dry and monotone “No Shit” here.

Some little things you took for granted like being able to sleep from midnight until 1 PM just don’t happen anymore on the weekends.

In fact, if you drink more than a couple beers or whiskey and waters now you probably aren’t going to be able to sleep much at all.

A little thing called “anxiety” or like me and my friends like it call it xxxiiettyyyy has taken over your normal ability to let loose and function normally.

Now after you binge drink on a Saturday during the day, and fall asleep around 10 PM you wake up at 2 AM with the straight “where am I’s” and you have to watch mindless infomercials or Wedding Crashers on TBS for the 1,000th time until you can doze off again around 4 AM just to wake up on Sunday to go to brunch or watch the game only to not be able to sleep at all Sunday night.  After two days of on and off disrupted sleep, by Monday you are a fat faced zombie with wet hair and an attitude.

This constant cycle of trying to act like you are 21 again while having the responsibilities you actually have: a job, rent, paying your cell phone bill, remembering to get toilet paper and just plain functioning beyond wearing sweats to your 10 AM, going to the gym then napping until someone wants to drink wine and watch Intervention like you had to do 5 years ago,  is an extremely hard balance that I am still trying to figure out completely.

Even though we are more tired than we have ever been in our entire life, it’s harder to sleep now than it has ever been before.

So here are a few tips to help you sleep tonight, tomorrow and hopefully Sunday, the world’s favorite insomnia day of the week.

1.  Work out

This is something that is really hard to fit into your schedule, especially when you live in New York.  Your constantly being bogged down by crazy work days, long hours then plans and events that go into the night that it’s so hard to nail down time to work out.  Not to mention that it sucks a big fat one.  Working out is the worst.  It almost always feels like a chore, and if you’re like me and the thought of going on an elliptical and then doing 100 sit ups makes you want to jump out the window, then you need to find something you like.

Tons of people have been trying the new Cross-fit craze and are totally into it, I recently found yoga and seriously it’s changed my life.  I’m just about as strong as I have been since I played Water Polo in college or swam in high school and it’s just a total cleansing of the soul.  If that last sentence made you want to punch yourself in the face, obvi yoga isn’t for you– try something else.

The thing is, working out really does help you release nervous energy.  You get that lactic acid moving and it’s like a release of endorphins that really helps you feel more motivated and happy.  I don’t think you have to get into a routine of working out every single day obsessively, but maybe switch up a few things in your life.

The only way I make myself go to yoga is I found a teacher that teaches every single wednesday, and no matter what, I go to that class and you can see a direct corrolation in my mood from Wednesday to the rest of the week.

If you don’t have the money or the time to go to a gym try other things like taking walks or runs right when you get out of work, or before.  When I was going through all that roommate horse shit last spring, the only thing that would calm me down was to throw on my sneakers and go for a giant, fast paced walk and talk to my mom or a friend on the phone.

But, if you do work out, try not to do it 2 hours before you go to bed–  that will rev you up and you won’t be able to sleep!

2.  Fan

When I moved to NY and I had a roommate that had such loud encounters with men that my neighbors approached me one morning complaining, I started sleeping with a fan to drown out her noises.  I realized that the noise of the fan was able to drown out most street noise as well.

I was able to sleep longer, more soundly because I had a constant noise in the background that sort of was able to override the rest of the world.

Once I introduced my boyfriend to the sound machine, he was completely sold.  He never used to be able to sleep in his bed through the night and now he can.

If you don’t like having a fan blow on you hook up this app to your speakers and dream away! I just use the free one (that goes without saying.)

Also this app rules because you can use it when you are traveling on business in the hotel room.

3.  Eye Mask

Ok this is a littttttttle girlie.  But when I’m having the sleep anxieties from drinking all weekend on Sunday, sometimes I need a sleep mask to help close out the light that comes in through my window.

You can get them at most drug stores for like $10 in the traveling section or get some super cute/fancy ones at tj maxx or online.

4. Try not to drink so much on Sunday

I know hair of the dog, the game’s on, your friend just got engaged…brunches, lunches and wine with dinner, but the less you drink– the more easy you will be able to get to sleep.  Alchohol is a depressant, as much as you feel great when you are out, the next morning comes depressing feelings of what the hell did I do last night and with depression comes anxiety.

Dubbed the Monday scarries by my friend Elizabeth, by Monday morning you are so filled with regret and remorse: I spent how much at Off the Wagon? WTF I ate nachos? I texted who?? that you can barely breathe so try to relax it on Sunday.

Sure a bloody mary or mimosa, maybe a glass of wine with dinner aren’t going to really add or subtract, if anything you might feel a little better, but more than a couple can send you further into a bought of hollyyy sheeetssss.

Try on Sunday to not drink as much caffeine, which brings me to the next one.

5. You’re probably drinking too much caffeine.

Think about your Monday – Friday routine.  Are you drinking coffee in the afternoon?  If you are, it’s probably effing up your sleep as well.  Also, diet coke has a ton of caffiene in it as that we don’t even think about, so if you’re drinking that after work or with dinner, it might be forcing you awake too.

I remember I went to the movies with my friend about 4 years ago and instead of dinner, we each got a giant XL diet coke at the movie theaters.

We were so hyped up on caffeine, we stayed awake until 3:30 AM giggling and prank calling people when we both had work in 5 hours.

Not a good look.

Other treats such as dark chocolate, and green tea have caffeine too so if you’re not able to sleep this might be a cause for sure.

6. Have an unwinding routine

If you get into having the same routine every Sunday.  Maybe go for a run in the afternoon or morning, or even a walk– make dinner early, take a really hot shower and drink some tea, read– you can sort of sink into the motions that you are supposed to feel tired, even if you aren’t from partying.

7.  Sleepy Time Tea

My friend Emily and I used this religiously in college and honestly, I don’t know how or why it works, but it really does.  Mind over matter.

With that being said, stay away from sleepy time extra, that shit made us cracked out to the max!

8. Make lists

If you are feeling super overwhelmed with what is going on in your life, make a list.  As soon as you have that list, it will automatically seem more manageable. Even put stupid small things on there like buy new socks too so you can feel happy when you cross them off.

9. Change your sheets

Fresh, clean sheets make sleeping so much easier. Stop being such a slobbone and wash them or change them once a week.  Make a habit of that every Sunday as well and even try to make sure your room is clean and everything is put away.

10. QVC

ALSO GIRLIE but there is something so soothing about watching these people sell kitchen gadgets and nail polish bedazzlers and your mind sort of slips into a mindless meditative state.

Happy Friday, now get to sleep.

xoxo,

wcw

Grow your eyelashes for $10 and it works!

So I learned this totally by accident.

You guys all know my pure obsession with aquaphor, I write about it all the time.  How I use it as eye cream and chapstick– put it on my elbows, feet before bed.  Cover it over my finger nails/cuticles like 2 times a day– and also use it to get make up off.

You guys also know that I am lazzzyyyyy sometimes so instead of delicately putting this magic potion on my eyes before bed like I am sure Lauren Conrad does, a lot of times I just smear it everywhere, all over my eyes and lashes and pass out reading about ladies stealing bras in Boca Raton.  Considering it’s completely free of fragrances and chemicals and a little more breathable then Vaseline, it won’t irritate your eyes or sting or anything.

So anyway, lately, I haven’t been wearing as much eyeliner– when I do it just smears everywhere and I start looking like Taylor Momson by 2 PM.  Also, I get those annoying lines right above my lid from where the lash line hits below my brown bone when I blink and it drives my friends crazy, and I have noticed that my eyelashes are a LOT longer than they used to be and I couldn’t figure it out.

These beauty surprises have happened to me before– when I was little and had poker straight hair, I went around my acre of backyard for about an hour and half, blowing on every single wishy wishing for wavy hair.  When I turned 12, my hair started getting wavy and curly.  Now obviously this is to blame on hormones, not on wishies, but when your 12 there still could have been a possibility it came from believing.

My eyelashes have always been short.  Having a best friend since kindergarten who is Italian with Brook Shields eyebrows and thick lashes made that apparent from the time we were in 6th grade giving ourselves makeovers with kool aid for hair dye.

If I just put on mascara, it was like nothing happened– she would try curling them and again nothing would happen.  They weren’t blonde or like little stubs, they just weren’t that long so I always wore eyeliner.

I never really cared about having longer lashes though– it wasn’t really on my radar until Latisse started coming out and I thought to myself: is having shorter thinner lashes really that debilitating?  Do I need to do something about this?

Oh yeah, and someone else made me feel inadequate..

Even though I worked on the Latisse brand for a couple years and could have gotten a free trial if I asked, I wasn’t really into it.  I had seen some results where the eyelashes got screwy– they were longer but some grew out straight and some curled up which made me second guess using it.  Also, once the free trial ran out, it would cost me about $100 a month to maintain.

No thanks!

I’ve tried using fake lashes,  but I can always see them when I blink? Does anyone else have that problem?

So anyway– I just sort of gave up on my eyes until I woke up one morning and realized they were significantly longer after just putting on mascara.

And the only thing different in my routine was that I had been smearing aquaphor, a birthday present from my mommy, thanks Kak! all over my face before bed a couple times a week.

So I googled it, and it turns out that it’s known that this stuff grows your lashes!

KEWL!

So if you don’t want to be as gross as me, you can do it a little more subtly and simply put a little dab on a qtip and sweep it over your lashes before bed to coat them.

If you do it a couple times a week, I swearrrrr you will see results.

Take pics from day 1 for a couple weeks and send them to me! I would love to blog about it! lizjenei@gmail.com

Hope you have a fantastic Wednesday– if you go to starbucks before 11 and get an espresso drink (skinny nonfat, vanilla iced lattes included) you get 1/2 off one in the afternoon this whole week.

TREAT SWEETIE.

xoxo,

wcw

How to look fresher than you are

So, I’ve talked about it before, most Mondays I’m straight up Alf so I try to do a beauty routine on Monday nights to get myself back together as best as possible for the rest of the week.  

Unfortunately, sometimes you don’t have time for any of this- you are invited to another happy hour, you have deadlines or you just don’t give a shit, thus you have to pull out the instant beauty reserves: desperate times call for desperate measures, kitty cats.

So you can use these very special beauty techniques for when you look like you have been hanging out with Pete Doherty all night and you need to go into work looking a little more (if anything) alive.

SHOWER

Even if you don’t think you can walk,  you still have to shower.  It’s essential.

If you can’t possibly wash your hair, at least wake yourself up with a body shower.  If your shower involves baby wipes, it’s not a real shower, stop fooling yourself.

Oh and before you go in the shower, smear some vaseline or aquaphor on your eyes to start getting off all that makeup from the night before. Once in the shower, make sure to wash your face– this is by far the best makeup removing face wash ever invented:  Clinique Rinse Off Foaming Cleanser.  Nothing gets make up off as well.

Oh, and make sure you clean and use real soap behind your ears and the back of your neck– you sweat so much there while you are sleeping and you don’t even realize that you smell like booze because your neck is technically behind you.

So wash yourself crazy good, scrubbing with a wash cloth.

Once you get out of the shower, put some eye cream right on your cheekbone — ( I just use aquaphor again) and cover your face in face lotion.  I swear by Oil of Olay and grab your two spoons you have in the freezer for emergencies.

In college and the first couple years I lived in NY, in the freezer I only had vodka and spoons.

The spoons I had in their to de-puff my eyes after a long night.  If you don’t have them in the freezer, you can just get a cup of ice water and stir it in there, then press it on your eye, curve side down, right under your eyes where the bags are.  Hold them on  your eye for about 30 seconds each side about three times.  You will see a significant difference.

Now, I suggested that you wash your hair, I swear you will just always look better if you wash your hair– but if you didn’t, brush it out and make sure you put in some dry shampoo, or baby powder.  If you have dark hair, either use bronzer or coca powder for this step, and pull your bangs back a la jen aniston circa ’03

or to the side.

If you did wash your hair, dry the roots and the front– put in some serum and pull the rest of it back to a low bun that you can shake out when you get to work or just let it air dry.  Clean hair that is slightly damp is better than grease ball on top of your head when you are trying to feign sleep/cleanliness.

Next step, once you are fully moisturized, make what I call the wonder glow enhancer by mixing a dab of liquid foundation, a little shake of powdered bronzer and a dab of face moisturizer.

This is the trifecta, my friends– and it will make you super glowly, dewy and alert.  Make sure to get it everywhere, especially on your eyelids and below your eyes, and then take a q tip to get it out of your brows so they don’t look creep status– also make sure you get your neck! Nothing worse than that line!

Next comes the camouflage.

You want to put concealer underneath your eyes and use a highlight to give yourself a little more of a glow.

I just use a shimmery white eyeshadow sparingly, but if you are down for buying a highlighter– go for it.  I suggested powder forms, as the cream or liquid ones can actually take off your makeup if not used correctly and makes you look blotchy.

I literally just put some highlight shimmer in the corners of my eyes, blended really well, and then the top of my cheek bones and then use a little blush or bronzer on the apples of your cheeks, forehead, tip of nose and cheek bones, this will give you that really awake, warm, I didn’t have 25 vodka sodis last night, dewy look

Next, put a little pinkish, warm or lighter shade bronzer on your eyelids to warm up your entire face.  Make sure it’s more of a pinky or lighter color, though, not an orange, and blend it in with your highlight you have in the corner of your eye and finish with mascara, eyeliner will make your face look puffier.

Lastly, if you want to pop a bold lip color on, you can totally try that– it will bring life and brightness to your face without looking over done, but otherwise, you can stick to a natural pale lip.

There you have it– tips to looking like you don’t smell even when you do!

xoxo,

wcw

I love when people own it.

Walking to work today I saw a chubby blonde in cropped yoga pants, ponytail on top of her head, waddling down 5th ave. street with this shirt on that was actually a little too tight:

and I just couldn’t help but smile ear to ear.

You see, I love when people OWN IT.  I mean really own it, not just half own it, but full blown own it.

Like this girl was walking down the street (where I have seen numerous models with their books running around, and countless celebs who only eat “raw” and have personal trainers not to mention everyone else that is trying to be someone special and fabulous) with a shirt that was a little too tight stating that she knows the guac costs extra and guess what, she doesn’t CARE people, she still wants the damn guac.  That is owning it.  That is not giving a shit and when people are that honest, that real, that down to earth in this city I almost want to reach out to them, grab them by their coats and say “you do exist, let’s go get some damn tasti-d!”

xoxo,

wcw

Rats in the city

One thing that people never really touch on when talking about the glamourous lifestyle of living in New York is the extreme rodent and disgusting creature infestation that is everywhere in this effing city.

Sure we love to glamorize our lives and talk about how we got in a verbal fight with ed westwick, or had lunch with the Kardashians.  We talk about fashion week, and who we saw, the night we played video games with Lloy Banks and Nick Cannon, but what us New Yorkers do NOT brag about, or talk about very often in the least with other people than the ones they know live in New York as well is the fact that rats, mice and cockroaches run this town.

The first time I saw a rat in New York, I couldn’t believe it.  Sure people have talked about them before, we all saw Ninja Turtles, but I never thought they were real or that prevalent.

I was walking back to my apartment around 2 AM after getting dropped off at the corner by my cab.  I lived up on 97th and Park at the time, but to everyone else I just lived on Park in the 90′s.

When I walked by a group of trash cans, all the sudden a big, black fur ball with a tale ran from one trash can to the street and I literally screamed.

I HATE rodents– I MEAN HATE.

I hate mice, I hate gerbils, they all freak me the eff out, so when I saw it I literally screamed like I just saw a chupacabra and ran into my apartment building saying ew ew ew ew all the way up my 3 floors of walk up stairs and right into my bed with the covers over my head.  That night I kept waking up, swearing they were everywhere.

Mostly you just see rats in the subway tracks– that you can see like once a week.  Just scurrying around, eating trash and being there.  Everyone just stares at them, wondering if they will be smashed by the approaching train or if they will survive.

Yesterday I saw a mouse on the subway platform, the day before that I saw a rat on the tracks, then this morning I saw a cockroach on the floor of my apartment.  The trifecta.

Sometimes if you are lucky– you will see a rat ON YOUR ACTUAL SUBWAY CAR.

This usually causes mass hysteria and people are screaming and running all around– nowhere to go and just freaking out, holding their feet up and moving in choreographed waves away from it.

One time, after coming home from a particularly intense weekend in Belmar, I was sleepily walking across the platform to the stairs with a suitcase around 10 PM on a Sunday when a rat ran across from feet.  I screamed so loud and said “EW EW EW EW AHH GAH EW EW EW BLAHHH AHHHHHH I HATE THIS CITY” on repeat fake crying that the preppy dude behind me saw the entire thing and started laughing uncontrollably saying that suckkksssss.  Like, thanks for the sympathy, love the boathouse jacket.

The worst part about this all is that not only are they all up on the streets, but these creatures live all up in your own apartments too.

Most people have seen at least one mouse or roach in one of their apartments.  I had one group of friends in Murray Hill that were almost completely infested– they were seeing mice at least once a week.  Another group of friends were in the same predicament in Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn– seeing mice weekly (they almost even borrowed a cat.)

Even worse then the mice, I think, are the roaches.

Cockroaches are everywhere.  I have seen about 15 in my life and every time, it doesn’t get any easier.

The worst story I ever heard was when someone I knew, who was paying $900 a month to sleep on a mattress on the floor, woke up with a roach in HER BED. DIE.

I had a group of friends who were collectively paying around $4,300 a month for an apartment in the 70′s that were completely infested with roaches and were seeing a couple a day.

It’s just nuts that we spend so much to live here, we sacrifice so much on a daily basis and on top of it all.  We have rats.

That is the reality of living in this city.

Sure it’s glamourous and most will say totally worth it, but even in the nicest apartments in the city, you might not be living alone.

xoxo,

wcw

WCW PHRASE OF THE MOMENT: TIKKI TIKKIS

As in, ohhhh shit, I got the tikki tikkis.

The tikki tikkis are those little anxiety feelings of “GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE, IT’S SO NICE OUT!” that you get on days like today and tomorrow when you are stuck in work behind a computer pricing out stock photography for pharma clients and it’s 65 degrees, sunny and perfect outside.

Tikkis can also be when you are anxious about a trip, like those little burst of electricity that fly through you and make you giddy and manic and almost shaking hours before your flight to Vegas with friends, or when you are starring at the clock for it to be 5 PM so you can catch the train down the shore.

The tikkis are fun, but also make you feel like you are losing it.

Symptoms of the tikkis include:

1. feeling like you drank too much coffee

2. slight shakes

3. continuous manic smiling

4. irrational behavior like packing up your desk and brushing your teeth at 2:45, when you still have 3 hours to go.

5. listening to dance music and actually dancing slightly at your desk

6. putting on makeup to kill time

7. going to talk to friends at work to kill time

8. shaking your leg

9. erratically looking at the clock every other minute and checking train times

10.  instant messaging your friends things like “GET ME OUT OF HERE!” “GAHHHHHH” “IT’S BEEN 2:27 FOR AN HOUR AND A HALF” “BLAH” and now “I GOT THE TIKKI TIKKIS!”

Sometimes the tikkis will force you to do crazy things like leave work at 3:30 or drink during lunch.  Try to refrain, but if it happens any way just look at them and scream manically “Sorry, I got the tikkis!”

Today is one of those days when the tikkis are going to rip through you like lightening which really sucks because, guess what? It’s ONLY Wednesday.  We still have two more days of this shit.

Eff.

Tikki on and hump away.

OH AND PS: It’s official.

xoxo,

wcw